“Mommy, you be the mommy, dolly will be the baby, Molly will be Molly, and I’ll be the big sister”, enthusiasm gleams from her lips.
My four year old wants to play.
I sip my Irish Crème coffee on my tattered couch. Morning hasn’t quite set in yet.
It’s December, and our stockings hang awaiting anticipated pleasure. Excitement is building in her young heart and I want badly, so badly, for things to be perfect for her.
But they’re not. And not the love that I have for her, or my strength, or conviction, can cover all the cracks and crevices that she has to step over, and sometimes into. It breaks my heart. This not being able to fix it business.
“Mommy, you clap when I come in the room”. She’s putting on a dance recital. She enters, black tutu and leotards. I applaud, I cheer.
She leaves again. Then returns. “Mommy, now clap when baby and I come in”. She has fairy wings now and hands me a crown. “You wear this”. Her small hands entrust me with a yellow crown made of construction paper, smeared with feathers, glue, and buttons. “There, you are beautiful”, as she places it carefully on my unbrushed head. She begins her dance.
I look around. Laundry sits folded, not put away from the night before. The coffee table littered with things. So many things. Behind us the Christmas tree sits half decorated and leaning. For the night before it fell. The carpet still wet. Needles. Haphazard needles. A weary mother who could not make it stand just so.
And then I see her, really see her dance. Her arms point straight. Fingers, each one of them positioned carefully, stretched wide. Open. She spins and twirls and watches her reflection in the tv. Christmas carols surround us. Something about shepherds. Holy nights. Stars. And a Savior. She sings and dances and twirls unabashedly . Joy-filled. Amidst our less than perfect Christmas.
My daughter teaches me everyday about love. About how it covers all. Messy living rooms, broken Christmas trees, broken lives and all. About my imperfect self, my imperfect life, but the very perfect love I have in the gift of the giver of love. And I begin to experience and know, just a little more, Christmas as it was intended to be, as it needed to be, when I unwrap Jesus.
Christy...love your post...so thankful our Savior came into our less then perfect world so we would understand perfect is in Him. He is where the joy is found the peace, the comfort in our not so perfect world...Good reminder. Thanks
ReplyDeleteChristy...love your post...so thankful our Savior came into our less then perfect world so we would understand perfect is in Him. He is where the joy is found the peace, the comfort in our not so perfect world...Good reminder. Thanks
ReplyDeleteOh Christy, my heart warmed as I read this. I especially lit up at the folded laundry that wasn't put away...us too! The half-decorated _________...us too!
ReplyDeleteIt touched my heart that you set it aside to "really see" her and in doing so gained more of love.
Thank you for speaking to my heart today. Yes!
What a beautiful post, Christy! I could picture your precious daughter. God bless you!
ReplyDeleteWonderful Christy! I can't tell you how many less than perfect Christmas's I have had in my life. And Jesus holds the only answer to it all..to having a peaceful Christmas..from the Prince of Peace. You Rock! Wish we could have Christmas together!
ReplyDeleteBlessings!
http://www.faithfilledfoodformoms.com/when-the-holidays-are-less-than-perfect/
Christy, My heart rejoices with yours with this post! My Christmas may be messy, less-than-perfect, but my Jesus makes it all beautiful!
ReplyDeletetears...you brought on tears...beautiful writing...so real and so honest and SO true to all of our lives. Thanks again my friend.
ReplyDeleteSo beautiful!
ReplyDeleteThank you for the reminder to see the beauty all around me and not just the mess.
Such a sweet post.
ReplyDeleteGreat post, Christy. Your daughter was the catalyst to open your eyes to the true wonder of Christmas. Isn't it like God to use a child to draw us closer to Him?
ReplyDeleteSo sweet. I can totally identify with the messy Christmas (or any day for that matter). It's so easy for me to get caught up in making the house, kids &our lives look neat and orderly. Oh, the precious moments found in the play of our children! I love how our Father uses our children to reveal himself to us! Thank you for sharing this post.
ReplyDeletesuch a wonderful post.more often our kids serve as inspiration to the many stories that we write and the upcoming ones ahead.
ReplyDeletethank you for sharing it.
Hello followed this link to your blogspot because my dear friend Karen recommend it.. I loved it. Thank you!
ReplyDeleteBeautiful! Thank you so much.
ReplyDeleteLove definitely covers all. And what doesn't seem perfect can become perfect in one split second if we adjust our mind and let it all in. Thanks for sharing!
ReplyDeleteBeautifully written! I often think about how my children are teaching me just as much, if not more, than I am teaching them.
ReplyDeleteGreat post Christy - thanks for sharing your tangible, yet thought-filled story.
ReplyDeleteI'm just a little bit behind...reading your Christmas blog when it's coming up to St. Patrick's Day!!! This is a good reminder for a perfectionist like me, to focus on the meaningful things in life. Our tree fell over too!
ReplyDelete